Kurrs' Digital Tapestry of Words

Today I got dread maintenance done. Always a rather religious experience, Hedy is also wonderful company for the three hours it tends to take. I only go every 10 months or so, I should go more often but... meh. I guess it's a manifestation of my traditional sense of masculinity rearing it's face... or something.

I went to a seafood restaurant and ate organic chicken with my family minus the east coast sister. It was Pat's going away dinner, it was strangely courteous and unconfrontational (we tend to argue). Patrick's clothing and belongings are strewn about the basement of the parents'. I was worried about the trip across Canada in the winter until I realised he has survived in conditions like the ones in the prairies right now only without shelter or much else. Having taught survival training, he tells me - rightly so - that he'd be find almost no matter what.

I drank a fair amount of white wine, it's effects swirl slightly about my head. I said goodbye, strangely, in some bizzare uncharacteristic machismo. As if to start to say I'm a guy, I don't mind you're gone, I'm no woman about all this and for once it was Pat who seemed less full of Italian male-stupidity syndrome. I must admit, when we hugged, it had the weight of planets. He might be right back... but... what if things work out, what if you/I don't come back? was the unspoken words upon the air.

I'm proud of him, but the truth of the matter is, I've hardly been able to think about much else since I realised he might not be coming back. It's that time of year it seems, that time of my life more appropriately.

Written On: Home Computer
Currently Listening: Death Cab For Cutie - Transatlanticism (full album)