Solitary Confinement
Originally Uploaded here by A V A
I'm unhappy again, I can't shake it. The play is this bright and burning candle I warm myself around, the thing that succeeded, that was beautiful. A point of sanity. But it won't end up breaking even, meaning that nothing I have done this summer has actually netted me income, or even not cost me thousands of dollars. I guaranteed my four, but work hand over fist still needs doing, and even after that is done I will not have stability, I still won't know how I'm paying rent. You need a break, a vacation, but I simply don't see how that will happen. And that's the truth of it.
I have alot of responsibility right now. It's empowering, but also kinda depressing, given that nothing is working out as I planned.
Parables of sand and salt still catch in my throat.
Written On: Home Computer
Comments
I spent 3 hours yesterday talking about music with a guy who plays "Gimme that Old Time Rock and Roll" arranged for swing piano at weddings, and it drives him mad. On the other hand, the stuff that he's working on up in his bedroom right now with all the strange instruments and the recording gear will probably never net him a dime. We don't have the sort of club here in Victoria where he and I could perform that sort of music, because it just wouldn't pay the bills. You get the drift.
Commercial success versus artistic satisfaction. Pick one out of two.
Posted by: Nicholas | July 27, 2006 10:12 AM