The Truth (Still One Person, Just Not The Same)
I know I don't write about you.
The trick was that you were actually what I wanted. You may not have been her, but she didn't want to be with me. And you were different, which was good. I liked that you were a brat, and I liked that you tried to keep things simple, so that were good at everything you did. And I liked how you wanted me. It was sometimes tough, but I agreed to more than I ever have because every breath you took I wanted to breathe back to you.
But you have ruined me. There is only so many times you can hurt a person. There is nothing left; I don't even dream of you. This sorrow, it isn't one of absence, it's cleaner than I'm used to. It's not loneliness as I normally know it, it's just sadness. Some part of you, the part that makes the decisions, doesn't want me. That, mixed up with how much we liked being together, cuts deeper than any stupid hollow bullshit that has come before. You were, perhaps, the first that I wanted to have children with, for real.
But I suppose the number always collapses down to zero.
Perfect, and indivisible.
Currently Listening: Young Sin - The Short EP (album d/l)