The Naviverse

The customary head-bob of the abundant "Exhausted Student" is the driving motivation for this to first be written on paper.

Wlcome to the vortex of my brain meats. This black hole is working overtime with no one to blame but myself *damn*. Sleep should happen tonight. Spending much money there after should not. The countdown of my bank account is rapidly continuing.

The pure brilliance of last night was boggling. The talent of a performer shows truest when there is nothing but mic's, amps and turn tables. The urge to blow $40 more on the itemss of the Pocket Dwellers and Sweatshop Union was strong in this one. The quality of the performance was well worth the $12 and the mass deprivation of sleep and school work. The pure harmony of the pocket dwellers was pure euphoria and 6 people on stage rapping at the same time was almost overwhelming. The hirrible thought tha tthis was the new, modern boy band was chased out of my mind with a pitchfork. These lyrics had meaning, something that is happening less and less these days. "It's all on us". Hearing a club full of people stinging "Us" at the same time regarding our responsibility in the events and decisions that occur to and around us all the time was flat out powerful. Grounding happened.

TANGENT

*NOTE* I am going to get rid of the public commenting ability because i'm getting way to much junk mail. I believe Tim and Chris have too. It's very simple to comment, just "sign in" and then you can comment on all three (or register using 'sign in" if you're not already in the cool kids club. Sorry to be a pain but i'm tired of getting 25 comments a day regarding sex and poker.

Posted by Navi at 9:48 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Have you ever noticed that everything seems so much more peaceful, more lovely when there is pretty, jovial classical music playing in the back ground?

A lovely day this shall be. Filled with reading, fabric and good music.

Time to read King Lear.

Posted by Navi at 11:36 AM | Permalink

I need to learn to slow time. It needs to come to a crashing halt so I can get some more reading done, or travel from one place to another. I keep telling myself that I'm over loading myself but I can't bring myself to miss out on things. No, it's not that I can't but that I don't want to, even though I should. This is going to change. It has to change.

That would be the theme for that last few days. Change. Such a funny word. It has mostly been minor but significant enough for me to notice. So far it seems generally positive.

Heh, there was a brief pause during this irregularly scheduled blog writing session to play two hours worth of X-men with my brother. Very cool. What we call bonding.

I've gotten to spend time with Andrew which has been wonderful. It's still a strange feeling, being attached to someone. Something I miss. Heh, he's already asked me to marry him once. A very amusing night.

I guess I’m not really in the 'blog-writing' mood. I think I'll head off leaving behind a schedule of events and a picture of cordelia.

Tuesday is, as always, a day of scholarly doom.

Wednesday is an early but short morning of work then some time to kill probably downtownish with my nose in a book (and maybe in a fabric store *nudges Tim*) then to Pocket Dwellers and Sweatshop that night.

Thursday is school in the morning, yet more reading before playing some croquet, and attending Tim's birthday celebration (not to mention visiting Sebastian :D.

Friday contains nothing but possibly much sleeping/reading until work from 3-7 from which I will depart and attend planet of the drums all night long.

Saturday will include much sleeping and eight hours of work as will Sunday.

Now the trick is that in amongst that I must compose an essay for the following Thursday. My schedule doesn't become much more open in the days leading up to the essay being due. Maybe I'll think about getting a tad more sleep and a little more research done.

Speaking of wasting time when better use of it could be made, I'm going to play some D'nD.

Goodnight dear ones.

Posted by Navi at 4:44 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

I still haven't fully recovered from Avery's party. Sounds strange but really isn't. Sleep has been neglected severally. So much so that I'm basically thinking of coming home from work, eating, reading for a short while and then curling up in bed so I can wake up at 5am the next morning for work again. This seems problematic to me. Maybe I'll get all of my Greek Tragedy homework done first. I'm very close.

Camping was more then amazing. The sun beat down on our shoulders but a combination of sunscreen and water. It was an amazing day filled with lessons of geography and human nature, capped of with a trek through a graveyard producing the overexcited screams of small children. The next day was well until I left for a short time. I came back and it was broken. The top foot of it had been snapped off and thrown into the field where I found it about three minutes later. I wanted to know who did it. No one confessed. I cried when I made the announcement. Thank the Gods for sunglasses. It was gifted to me at spring mysteries. I managed to mend it somewhat... but it's just... *sigh* Overall the trip was great.

The rest of the week has been filled with little yet important things. School work is being done. It feels good. Sleep is starting to happen.

I believe I am now in a relationship. Such a strange feeling, yet comfortable. I have a feeling this will be rather low maintenance (the way I like it) but still incredible. Andrew, you're wonderful.

Infected mushroom = religious experience. Not my words but they do the trick. Talk about air. Wow it was intense. I believe the best show I've ever seen/experienced. I danced through the entire thing, sore, hungry and thirsty. Nothing mattered, just the movement, the energy. I like that feeling.

Next up sweatshop. Then maybe planet of the drums (though that's a big maybe).

Sleep is love. Showers are love too. Time to wash off the salt.

Posted by Navi at 6:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Yesterday was insane. There are no other words to describe it.

It began with a pack game that was one of the most intense I've ever had.... I think I frightened Eugene.

Then came the party. Avery, you are awesome. I drank way too much and am only now beginning to stabilize. I actually had to cop out of the first half of work because I felt so sick. I came out of it with a bruised foot and a fat lip (oh and some burn marks; I finally managed to do dragon's breath!). Jhayne's pictures tell it all.

I don't know if could say anything more except "Hail Dionysus"

Posted by Navi at 1:31 PM | Permalink

This melancholy balance of events is making me nauseous. Wavering back and forth between two polar opposites, trying to keep my balance and stumbling over foreign objects, or simply myself.

I keep meticulously cleaning. Everything has its place, where it belongs and should be when not in use. Maybe I'm projecting again, due to the lack of ability to do it myself.

I keep giving advice, helpful advice so I'm told. Apparently my muse isn't into selfishness.

Posted by Navi at 9:32 AM | Permalink

An immense amount of insanity within the last four days.

I made it to the farmers market with manda and bought nummy raspberries. I wonder if I'll get black berries by the end of August.

Nobilis was incredible. We have a rockin group and not all were present (if I am to assume rightly) so things can just get better. I'm going to have to have a private meeting with the big white book of glory.

Sin was wonderfuloff. I had much fun but there was really something missing. Maybe it was the immense amount of sleep I was neglecting myself of. Maybe it was the lack of restraint that others showed. It was a sexy night none the less. *oh, and some how I managed to get a bruise at the bottom of my sternum.... friggin corsets*

The day after was somewhat useless. I went out for and early father's day brunch with my "family" then went straight to work. Then came home. I think. I know I talked to Andrew for awhile and kept him awake for way too long.

Yesterday the awesome insanity started.

I'm going on a camping trip with my grade 5 class. We're going up to Yale to visit a bunch of places up there. There will be hiking and what not and it's an overnighter which means I get to purchase my tent (my birthday gift from my parents) even earlier then expected. It's going to be incredible.

Then I went to work and had my yearly review. I got a $.40 raise (which isn't too bad for retail and more then last years) and that brightened my day. Then I trekked over to Tim’s place and went to East is East (sooooo gooood) with many a peoples. That place is t3h awesome. I want one in my basement.

Then mmmm movie night. I spent most of it curled in a ball and hiding my face from the screen. Wicked movie though.

Then I had a long w/talk. Things are resolved. My luck is with him, as is my strength. It made me sad but I didn't cry (which was incredible due to the amount of tired I was). It was simply what needed to happen.

Today has still been cool. My first paper of the year was returned with a shiny new A- on it which for me is almost a miracle. I suddenly felt bad for periodically falling asleep during his class.

Ryan rain and thunderstorms made me happy. I took a couple of pictures. Maybe I’ll put them on my computer tonight. Maybe I'll just fall down. *London bridges falling down...*

Posted by Navi at 2:40 PM | Permalink

i'm being assulted by spam agian.

Everything is weird. There isn't really anything that is completly comfortable. There's always some quark or some stray thought that creeps its way in and begins whispering in my ear. I want to make it dead. What i perceieve and what is said differs so greatly that it makes me want to cry or run or laugh; it just makes no sense. Why spare me? I'd rather just know.

I think I need to go camping. Camping with one person for like five days near a body of water that we can go fishing and boating in where I don't care what is going on. Something like my excursion to Mexico, where all I did was forget until the moment hit me and thinking was again ok. I made my decisions and delt with them when I had returned, but not a moment sooner.

*tangent* I was only doing what I was told. The arangement worked out in all angles but I should have listened to that small little voice that reinforced my idoicy. I'm ok but others are not which somehow cancels my okness out. I want to help... I want to block things out, i keep things blocked out. I don't like things like that.

Sin is a wonderful place. It allowes you to break *as tim says*. Small fractures that are barely visible shatter to mosaics on the floor. My feet were black, my hair slightly frizzlled and my head was spinning by the end of the night. People are sexy. People shouldn't be so sexy. It makes life difficult.

I'm tired and Tim needs to call me soon or the conversation isn't going to happen. That would be unfortunate.

I can't think anymore... i'll elaborate on this more later *much to the dismay of tim*.

Posted by Navi at 5:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

It is almost finished. My master piece needs only a few more stitches and a touch of epoxy to be comeplete. I shall be up for at least another hour perfecting the minor details so I will never have to worry of it again. It shall be beautiful.

The world keeps turning yet I am hopelessly falling behind. Today was almost functional though lacking in productivity. I know more about wagner sprayers then I ever wanted to. Julie, my one connection to sanity, is leaving work. Her babysitter managed to screw things up and no longer has someone to watch her kids. Many problems have been blowing her way. I'll miss her.

I am the black sheep in my family. It never rang so apparent as today when I went for Sushii with my mother and brother. Maybe that's why I want out of here so badly... so I can stop feeling like an outcast.

Did you fall asleep on your computer Andrew? I hope you're sleeping for the both of us. I like your pictures. They beat mine to a pulp.

Long bus rides are almost always educational. I think I'm loosing my touch.

I think it's time to sew snaps and glue coins. See you in the morning Amanda.

Posted by Navi at 11:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I miss you. I haven't missed anyone like this in a rather long time. It feels weird.

Decisions will be made soon. My brain will decode the information and life will change a bit.

This week needs to be finished. Don't get me wrong, it's going to be a hella enjoyable week (and I don't think I've done so much Role Playing in my life in this short a time, and oh, the costume creation! I need glue).

Reading is getting caught up! I am set for the next five weeks in one class, and have begun reading Vanity Fair, which I’m happy to say is somewhat an easy read (it should be done in the next five or so days). Then on to David Copperfield. Hurray for British Literature.

I'm slowly sliding down the slippery slope of nocturnalism. (I blame Tim). I think I'm just going to cave and go talk to him whilst I sew/pin/plan costumes and read some more pages of Vanity Fair and he sets up his new computer.

Andrea darling I think I'm skipping capoeira to come see you tomorrow (with my skirt in hand), do I need to purchase a zipper? *ring me*

I hope I didn't bore you all with this sadly mediocre entree.

Posted by Navi at 10:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Sleep was important. Important enough to not go to teach little people today. The day that preceded it caused me to be shaking by the end of it. I was 'random twitching' once ever couple of minutes or so. I think that was as close as I've ever come to hitting the wall.

Now I shall read Hamlet, go to work (for only four hours mind you), capoeira and then do some gaming. The next day will be filled with editing, reading and mindless note taking.

Things are weird and soon to become less weird. This will help situation A.

Yes I enjoy crypticism (new word!).

Posted by Navi at 10:39 AM | Permalink

Work shall be filled with thoughts that have nothing to do with the automatic pilot paint mixing I'll be doing at the time. Eight hours of disterbance and hopefully eight hours of sleep to follow it.

Have a good trip Andrew. See you when you get back.

Posted by Navi at 12:37 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

- Neglected to go swimming in exchange for making it downtown earlish.
- Baught seven items of clothing with Andrea including a really nice, yet $8, boostier and several other shirts.
- Went through Chinatown with Andrew amongst other places.
- Lunch and pictures with the LOR.
- Attacked Jahyne with birthday present.
- Attempted Nobilis... failed somewhat... ended up mildly high, recieving presents (thank you Travis!), drinking chai and watching the musical edition of buffy until 5am.

- Woke up, trudged home, went back to the sky train station, was late for school.
- Did my best not to fall asleep at school, flew too work (or was that just the skytrain...).
- Attacked Urban Thai *drools*

Now, I am going to read and wait for phone calls.

Days = Fun...

Tomorrow = Write an essay. Fuckered. Oh and make nobilis costumes.... YAY for an open night though! If you would like my company, give me a ring.

Posted by Navi at 10:00 PM | Permalink