somewhat alone in the crowd, today.
I haven't posted this late in some time. It's a habit that I was trying, am trying, to break. It's at night, when my body is run down and I haven't had enough sleep and I'm starting to be hungry for breakfast, that I start to fall into circular emotions.
I have a job interview tomorrow, should go well, and maybe I'll have time for it in my schedule. I'm going to play tennis with some guy who doesn't remember who I am who I'm going to convince to help me learn/re-learn/unlearn the french I was taught in school. He doesn't know this yet.
I teach incredibly wealthy children to play music.
I am still excited about playing in rehearsals where not everyone is up to the level that I am at. I have no desire to be dissatisfied with sitting through 3 hours of music, in fact, I generally love it. I spent an hour playing 5 bars over and over today because I needed to, because this is how I get to get paid to sit through those three hours and enjoy myself immensely. I wouldn't bother if I wasn't going to enjoy it. I also kind of like the repetition - it's almost meditative.
I find I've become very attached to repetitive things lately - notes, weeding, watering, kneading bread, making soup, doing dishes in the morning whilst having coffee. Little patterns that I can keep within my changing schedule to keep me sane.
Karate tomorrow. I really like it. I look forward to being able to spar with the martial arts oriented people in my life. It's one of those neat activities that can be social. Apparently you do joint manipulations and sweeps and stuff in karate too (not that I'll be learning those for quite some time). I'm a little disappointed by what I've been reading about the belt testing though. I'd hoped that it would be a little more of an objective test, but from what I've read it's as political as passing public school children through the grades. Pah.
I have memorized my first kata, though, and it's great fun. Taikyoku shodan, it's called, which means first step or first cause. You get to kiai, punch, step and turn. heh heh heh. Bloody turns. Every time I do one I have to fight ballet training and force myself to turn on my heels not my toes. gah. I also want to know what the funky stuff the more advanced students do with their hands in the breathing exercise is.
People are sometimes awesome beyond what I give them credit for. I have great difficulty being unable to pay for things, particularly when I feel they are worth more than I am required to pay. Hopefully this will not last very much longer.
There's more I'd write about distance and friendship and past and present-future, but I'm dissatisfied with the words I have for that right now.
I have become somewhat addicted to the little naruto videos the children I moderate in chat upload. There is a mass viewing of the actual series in the works. I have truly sunk to new depths.