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Originally uploaded by okta'lonli.
Don't let the emo one fool you, comments are disabled because I don't like you. I control the server's moods, and thus, the universe*. Yes.
*and, of course, by extension, Tim. C remains the only obstacle...
Originally Uploaded by michel2233
I'm feeling like biting just about everyone's head off right now. It's not that you're not my friend, it's just that I dislike everyone right now. I'm also having trouble not yelling FUCK YOU at strangers. HA. ha.
I blew the last interview for the nice job. Taking businessy type interviews is a skill that I've never bothered to develop, and it showed. It's something I'd be good at, too, if I concentrated and cared a little more. A little pre-thought about tricky questions and a little more emphasis on acting within the interview would go a long way. I think pausing slightly before answering questions occasionally to show that you were thinking about them would be useful. I could probably purposefully open up a bit more in order to show personality and not be quite so private - in other words - treat the interviewer more like a person and less like a boss. Yeah. not so hard...
I'm almost inclined to work on it just for the sake of knowing I can and knowing that I beat someone else at a useless skill - kind of the way I feel, to a certain extent, about the audition process - here, lets test your musicality and skill in playing in an orchestral setting by making you play alone in a sterile room - and oh, it better be perfect, too
I'll perfect the latter, but I'm not sure the interview skill is particularly needful...still, the fact that I got to the last interview with the owner and then someone else beat me makes the competitive monster side of me come out.
I made myself feel better by applying to spud. heh
I'm bored. I think that's what's probably making me so damn bitchy and antisocial (which of course adds to the boredom). I should do something but I'm not really losing the intense desire to curse at people and avoid them. gah. Unfortunate.
I'm incredibly tired. I've been making the extra push to practice as much as possible lately, and it's somewhat destructive. I'm terrified that I won't get this job. I'm terrified that I might get this job. Not having to worry so much about money would be so great. Getting off at 5 would be so great. working monday through friday might be a little odd. I wonder about concerts... but I'd be able to go to karate more.haha.
Mom's going to be here for January. Hopefully we won't clash. Will I have a job then? Will I still be doing gamelan? I rather hope I can, still, even if it does destroy me to rehearse that late and then wake up early the next day. Shy people are so difficult sometimes. What to do?!?
I'm having trouble eating enough. Not in any sort of I don't have enough food sense, but more in the I've made enough for three and I'm still hungry - it seems stupid to make more but.... sense. Gah. Recent photos also document my decided increase in upper body strength. Rawr.
I want to sew! I've actually had sewing dreams lately, much to my amusement.
NYO auditions are coming up again. Haven't really been practicing the excerpts as much as I'd like, but they're all sounding pretty good - but wait, if I get this job, what happens to the summer?hahaha.
I have not written a single christmas card. I'm not sure I'm going to. I probably should send one off to the grandparents at the very least.
Green lentils cook differently than red.
You are so incredibly attractive sometimes that I can hardly stand to watch you. Unfair!
I will now sleep.